Online dating geek english


Womanly Wisdom from a Geeky Guy #3 For the risk-adverse who decided the first two womanly tips might sound somewhat helpful, you must also heed caution if deciding to tackle the popular online dating websites.

Should you receive emails or requests to chat online with any ‘so-called’ male entities during this quasi-religious day, I would advise you to calmly shut your computer down, disconnect every cable attached to it, and then soak the PC in a bath of acid for approximately 48 hours. That reminds me, I need to make plans with my ass-clown friends to find out who’s bringing the buffalo chicken dip and who’s buying the Coors Light.

Still nerdettes, there are some nuggets in here for you as well, so don’t wander off. Despite being funny and enjoying my own material, I’m actually referring to your dating profile length… If there is anything I’ve learned during my years of profile creating, it’s that women are pretty big on the whole communication thing (which seems to be most evident when you are trying to watch ANY game seven of a professional sports playoff series).

If that weren’t demanding enough, they also enjoy the written word as well, and this includes how you describe yourself.

What this means for you ladies, is that unless you have somehow managed to scrape up the equivalent of the U. national debt in order to purchase five seconds of TV air time during the big game, then you can pretty much put a kibosh on getting any attention on thy holy day if you plan on spending time with your new internet catch.

Womanly Wisdom from a Geeky Guy #2 Many women are probably already familiar with how quickly men transform with Optimus Prime-like speed and efficiency when they are even in the remote vicinity of other males in pretty much any environment short of a funeral.

(Although in-law-based funerals may not be exempt for some.) Nevertheless, mix together the most important football game in the known universe along with an unending flow of alcohol, a constant stream of attractive half-naked women marching across every other advertisement along with a supply of chips to keep Rosie O’Donnell happy for at least three days, and you have set up the perfect storm of primitive male communication at its core.

The 2% of a man’s brain capacity which is devoted to attention span is only properly functioning during the 24 hour period known every year as Super Bowl Sunday.Since we are fast approaching an extended Labor Day holiday weekend, I figured I would grace all of my readers with another one of my online love for dummies posts… Should you happen to be single and reading this, than you probably fall into one of three camps: : You are officially fed up with meeting the horny meat and/or airheads that frequent your local bar scene.Therefore, you have decided to get serious about finding love amongst the horny meat and/or airheads that make up the online dating scene.Yes, that smell can mean only one of two things: either the meal from the above mentioned taqueria still hasn’t made its final curtain call, or it’s Super Bowl time! After squeezing enough bathroom jokes into an opening segment to make any male over the age of nine proud, you might be asking yourself, what does any of this disgusting but hilarious potty talk have to do with geeks or online-dating? While most of my more intelligent readers have already clicked on the adjacent advertising link claiming you can make a million dollars an hour and lose weight while eating doughnut holes from the comfort of your beanbag chair, some of you have decided to take the more painful path and see where this Seinfeld-esque blog is heading.More than likely, you just haven’t found the ad yet.In any event, there is much to be learned from the relationship, or lack thereof, between internet dating and the biggest sports day of the year.

You must have an account to comment. Please register or login here!