So yes you want men to pursue you, and if you are confident this will naturally happen, but you don’t want to intentionally get him to chase you because this is just neediness all dressed up.When you are truly confident and independent, he won’t take you for granted, he won’t vanish for days at a time, he won’t tell you he “doesn’t want a relationship” and continue treating you as girlfriend anyway – instead, he will lock it down because he’ll be too scared someone else will snatch you up if he doesn’t!
Since you are living your life and aren’t relying on his approval to make you happy, he automatically steps up and tries to carve space for himself in your life.
We’ve used frames a lot for the sake of getting sexually intimate with women quickly…
now let’s look at the power of frames in the context of exclusive relationships a bit more. Ricardus was one of the most prolific and respected coaches in the men’s dating advice industry. Ricardus is currently retired from the dating advice industry.
If this is true, those men in the white coats should have been on me like white on rice. I had a very needy mindset and I derived way too much of my self-worth from how men responded to be. (To know what it does look like, check out this article: 10 Things Confident People Do Differently in Dating and Relationships.) It took a long time to realize I needed to stop prioritizing guys above myself, at least until he started treating like a priority.
When you are overly accommodating to him then he doesn’t feel a real push or motivation to step up and invest in you. You know you can get to it at any time so you don’t really feel an urgency.
By that, I mean fill your life with fun, meaningful activities.