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Once you accept your shape, then you can work within it.

Too many people who are concerned about their weight try to dress to conceal it, usually wearing clothes that are too big and loose.

Some people have shorter torsos and trunks, which will affect their visual proportions; a longer torso makes you look skinnier even if you’re overweight while a shorter one makes you appear wider.

Even if you lose weight, it’s no guarantee that you’re going to look like the cover of Men’s Health; a visible six-pack is as much the result of genetics, dehydration and favorable lighting as it is eating nothing but broiled chicken breasts and steamed broccoli and five hundred crunches a day.

The next key is simply to accept that your body is your body and your shape is your shape and there is only so much that you can do to change that.

Your overall shape is going to be controlled by your bone structure and genetics as much as is by your diet and exercise.

There’s no denying that looks find you attractive is to understand that being fat isn’t a cut and dry issue. Some people can lose weight without barely trying while others can exercise and diet until their eyes bleed and barely see the scale shift.

Weight in the US is a loaded subject; society often equates being heavy with being lazy and/or weak-willed. As we’ve been learning over the years, weight gain and loss is more complicated than a simple issue of “calories ingested look as good as skinny feels?

But being large and in charge doesn’t mean that you’re doomed to a life of being forever alone; in fact, you may find that you have far more options for finding love, sex and happiness than you’d ever believe possible. There are plenty of notable examples out there if you look around. Seth Rogan is no Abercrombie and Fitch model but he’s also happily married.

Large dudes will frequently lament that their size automatically disqualifies them from dating – they believe that there is simply no way a woman could possibly like somebody who’s body isn’t rippled and shiny like a buttered ear of corn. Kevin Smith, for all of his fashion sins that I will get into in a second, is happily married with a lovely wife and daughter. It’s easy to forget this when the TV and magazines are showing you nothing but image after image of cut, veiny men with swimmers builds with women draped all over them like fur stoles, but women actually like a far wider range of body types than we’d think.

Ask five women what their ideal male build is and you’ll get six different answers.

It can be fun, terrible, exciting, hard — the adjectives used to describe it are endless.

But this guide was created to help you navigate your way through all those adjectives and shed the only light you’ll ever need on an otherwise confusing, strenuous experience.

Being fat is treated as a referendum on your worth as a person – people see it as an implication that you’re only fat because you simply don’t want to change badly enough. The societal disdain for heavyset people is so ingrained that even people who are fat feel ashamed about who they are and that they have to apologize for some personal flaw that leaves them with the mark of Canes when the truth about obesity is as much about external factors as it is about food consumption.

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